elizabeth's story

Generation FIVE Workshop, Berkeley, CA, USA; April 2005

How did you feel about using digital video as a way to craft and tell your story?

I had no experience with digital video when I participated in the workshop. I was without a doubt the least experienced and comfortable with the medium, of the group participants (or maybe historically!). I had – up until that time – hardly had any experience even using the internet (I give this as an example of how limited by skill level was). I was intimidated and nervous until it became clear that there was support/mentoring in the technical arena of production. In truth, while there were parts I learned and did myself, I had a great deal of tech work done by the mentors – allowing me to focus on the content. However, as the days passed I found the medium – as they say – quite user friendly. This fueled my interest and view of the medium as something that a wide variety of folks can learn.

What do you think is the power of telling stories through this method?

I was able to combine my story, my artwork and music, creating a rich and concise document. The process of making a 'movie' in narrative allowed me to acclimate and move into deeper emotional terrain. Making the digital movie in the presence of others altered the isolating aspect of my trauma; the very activity of production with other storytellers was a step away from the crushing shame and years of feeling alone and different. I cannot stress how important I think the process is; the companionship in mentoring, the work on the story with others, the support and emotional – not just technical - collaboration. I felt like a veteran in the company of other survivors, understood and respected.

Who have you shared your story with? What responses have you received?

My story is part of the Generation FIVE educational DVD on child sexual assault. G5 trainers use it in a variety of settings. I have used this DVD, including my story, with several groups of people where I live to open discussions about trauma and community accountability and change. I also use the DVD in a 12 week group I facilitate on somatics and trauma for women survivors, most of whom are former or current drug users. I have found that my story serves as a model of strength for the women I work with; how resilience plays an essential role in how we survive trauma, as well as the role of love and visibility. I have showed the DVD to friends, and to my sister. This lead to a remarkable discussion - the first time we were really able to talk - about trauma in our family.

In what ways has the process of both creating and sharing your digital story contributed to change in you? (if it has ...)

Most importantly, it has given me a sense of pride. It has afforded me a view of how far I have come and the depth of emotional work I have accomplished. And I think my digital story is emotional, close to the heart, not didactic. I think - and hope others agree - that it has a quality of tenderness, sadness, and hope. It was an accomplishment for me, a benchmark. I am inspired to make more, to look into my life, and with the material, connect to others. I have become a complete fan of the medium. I want the women I work with to begin to tell their stories, the youth I work with, etc.

Do you it's important to connect survivors globally, and how useful is digital storytelling in this?

Absolutely important. It is a perfect medium to facilitate dialogue and create connection in the face of the issues that separate us, creating the possibility of teaching, experiencing a sense of our mutual humanity, and the profound similarities in our life experiences.